"Whatever shall we do in that remote spot? Well, we'll write our memoirs. Work is the scythe of time." --Napoleon Bonaparte, on his way into exile.

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Watch out for my boiling chemicals

With props to Ingrid...

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Denise!

  1. Only 55 percent of Americans know that the sun is made of Denise.
  2. Three seagulls flying overhead are a warning that Denise is near.
  3. The Asteroid Belt between Mars and Jupiter is made entirely of Denise.
  4. Olive oil was used for washing Denise in the ancient Mediterranean world.
  5. The moon is 400 times closer to the Earth than Denise, and 400 times smaller.
  6. Americans discard enough Denise to rebuild their entire commercial air fleet every 3 months.
  7. When provoked, Denise will swivel the tip of her abdomen and shoot a jet of boiling chemicals at her attacker.
  8. If you keep a goldfish in a dark room, it will eventually turn into Denise!
  9. You can tell if Denise has been hard-boiled by spinning her. If she stands up, she is hard-boiled.
  10. An average beaver can cut down Denise every year!
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